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This is what healing looks like
Category: Pain, Help
I Haven’t Written in a Long Time
I haven’t written in a long time not because I wouldn’t.
I haven’t written in a long time just because I couldn’t.
There were a lot of things that I could have said but I didn’t want to.
So now I feel the need to say what I have been through.
I lost my mom recently and it had me down.
My words should give hope to someone so that’s why I write them down.
I am trying to open up but it’s easier to stay in the shadows and not make a sound.
Quietly thinking of memories we shared. Her and I were alike in ways that seemed different until now.
I miss her voice though it still echoes in my head. I miss her love although it will always be around.
I will be alright because she left me strong, and one day I’ll see her again so I’ll just keep holding on.
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Wishing It Were not So
There is that thing that you wished were not so. It may just be me, but I doubt if I am alone. Finding out something you just didn’t want to know, and it hurts so bad that you wish it were not so. I have a hard time with changing situations, changing times, pretty much anything that changes, but nevertheless it is what it is. For everyone that wished it were not so, I UNDERSTAND.
The solution is to accept the new change, or situation, and find a way to move onto the next because one things for sure, this too shall pass. It will keep changing, it will keep being new and it will keep you wishing it were not so. I am accepting this fact DAILY. I don’t think I will ever fully accept the changes but I will put all things into perspective and grow.
Blessings~
My Words
I haven’t written my words in quite some time.
It has been a struggle, a lot has been on my mind.
The world has a way of making you look twice.
Discounting your blessings, and creating an ugly side.
Finding yourself crying, weeping and sad.
Not counting how many ways your life could be worse, terrible, or bad.
There are words that I could use to describe the feelings that my mind would cover.
The best words I choose are Love, Endless Love poured out over and over.
The Love created a language beyond my words.
It became an expression, it created my life worth.
My words were not there but they didn’t have to be.
Your Love filled in the places that my words could not speak.
Space and Time
I will give you your space, I will give you your time.
I am here for you when something is on your mind.
I understand you are hurting right now, and I don’t want to pry.
I will be a good friend to you, on my shoulder you can cry.
I know it is hard to go through life right now, but I promise it gets better someway, somehow.
I know your heart is broken, you cannot understand why, take your own time now and soon peace will be found.
I will give you your space and time, but meanwhile I’ll be praying that you will be alright.
I know you will recover, and you’ll be stronger too, for God will comfort you and hold you tight.
Sadness
A prayer:
Lord you know what sadness feels like, even Jesus wept. Please comfort those that are sad today. Help them to not try and make sense of what has happened, but lean on You for strength.
Keep our hearts before You and heal our brokenness. Wipe every tear and calm every heart. Give us now the Peace that passes all understanding, and help us to move forward showing Your Love to one another.
Let us not be consumed with the little things, but consume us with Love for one another. You are our Peace, O God, and You are our strength. Glory to Your name.
Amen
Pain ControlÂ
So I recently had surgery for the first time in my adult life and it has me looking at pain a little different. I have always dealt with a level of pain due to my profession and life but it has always been controlled. This has been eye opening! I don’t usually take medicine, not because I’m against it but because my body functions well without it. There are always healthy ways I have found to assist me in my life journey that has given me a better outcome. This is not to say that I never take anything, but I try to keep it to a minimum unless deemed necessary.
So prior to the surgery I was given a prescription for some strong pain medicine which I filled, just in case. Honestly I didn’t think I would need it but ultimately I did. Of course I used it as needed and only as needed, but I used it. Pain is a serious thing and when you are dealing with it in any form all you want is RELIEF. I understand emotional pain very well, but now I truly understand physical pain as well and I sympathize with those who have to deal with it on a daily.
I have been learning pain control through this process and it s very difficult for me. The lesson for me has been dependency on something other than another healthier alternative mostly because of the side effects of the medication.
There is always side effects to pain control. It teaches dependency on an outside source rather than dependency on an eternal source. It teaches the user how to cover pain rather than deal with the source of the pain in a long term pain control situation. It teaches how to numb true feelings and mask true hurt and pain. It also teaches loneliness because no one truly understands my pain.
I know this physical pain will end soon for me, but for some people it will take a longer process. Allow yourself time to physically heal using your pain control methods but don’t allow yourself to get stuck in those methods. Emotional pain is tied to physical pain and sometimes it is very hard to separate the two. Physical pain can be medicated it is much harder to medicate emotional pain. There are people dealing with both simultaneously and my prayer for you is that you will seek help.
Help can come in many forms, but covering your pain ultimately leads to more pain, deeper pain, and in most cases sickness as a result. Find someone you trust, pray, and keep pressing through because help is there. My pain has a deadline, it will come to an end and so will yours.
Be encouraged, and keep pushing through.
Blessings~
You Made Me Beautiful AA 